The Framers Forum

Yesterday phone goes.
Tom answers it.
Guy says "you sent me ten mounts, nine were in antique white, one was in polar white".
"oh" says tom. "sorry about that, we'll send you a replacement"
"and another thing," says matey, "its got writing printed on it".
silence.
Then tom says "thats the back of the mount".

Which would have been fine, had he not added "you half-wit".


one of those "did i really say that out loud" moments.

If it's just a mount, I usually cut off the bit with the printing. Customers rarely say anything, but it's the way that they look straight at the printing, as if they've not got what they expected.

I like the "half wit" bit. You just can't get the staff these days!

A lot of the materials that I use in the printing trade have a peelable coating on to prevent scratching. Polycarbonate labels and machine panel overlays, that kind of thing. Sometimes this is translucent white, mostly clear but occasionally yellow.

Not unknown for the odd customer to phone and complain that we have printed the job in the wrong colour. A stunned silence usually follows after you tactfully explain that they may have left the protective coating on..............!

That reminds me of a lady who came in with two pics she wanted reframed as the frames were looking a bit tatty. They were alluminium wrapped wood. When I took a closer look, I realised that they still had the protective plastic on and this had picked up all the scuffs and scratches. Hey Presto! I whipped the plastic off to reveal the pristine metal underneath. Did myself out of a reframing job, but it was worth it to see the look of astonishment.

Several years ago, a rather haughty woman come in looking to have an 8 x 10 mat cut for a 5 x 7 postcard. After she picked out the color, I said to her, “So, you want an inch and a half border.” (I am quick and able to do complicated mathematic functions in my head. )

“No, no, no!”, she said. She grabbed a sheet of scrap paper and wrote down 10 and 8 under which she wrote 7 and 5. Speaking to me like I was a slow, six year old, she carefully subtracted the numbers and circled the number 3 beneath the 10 and the 7. “I want a three inch border”, she proclaimed with great authority.

“Okay”, said I, and without another word proceeded to cut this 8 x 10 mat with a 2” x 4” opening.

I returned to this mat to the design counter and place it over her post card without saying a word. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

After a few seconds I said, “Most people would have chosen to have a bit more of their art exposed, but, I suppose, it’s a matter of taste.”

She stood their without a word.

I grabbed the scrap paper that she had used to try to humiliate me and said, “Since there are two sides to a mat, what I would have done if this were my post card, was to divide the three (elaborately circling the already circled “3”) by two and give myself an inch and a half border. But, that's just me.”

She still remained mute.

After a few seconds, I suggested, “Is that what you wanted?”

She simply nodded. I recut the mat, and she paid me.

Oddly enough, she has never returned. Go figure!

Ooooooooo....... Bill! You are a little scamp. Don't you know it's wicked to mock the afflicted.

Ever had someone bring in a 20x30 frame and want it cut down to make 2 15x10s?

A few years ago I rang up a customer to tell her that her framing order was ready, it was a very small frame, She asked me to remind her how much it was and I told her £18. Two months later she came in to collect it. I wrapped it up and she held out £80. I was a bit confused with this and told her that it was only £18!
A big look of relief came over her face as she had misheard me thinking I had said £80 and it had taken her 2 months to save up the money from her pension.
I’m gonna have to learn to speak more clearly on the phone.

prospero wrote: Ever had someone bring in a 20x30 frame and want it cut down to make 2 15x10s?

No, but I’ve had something equally as difficult to explain.

I don’t remember the dimensions exactly but a customer wanted, say, a 24 x 30 frame cut “down” to 20 x 32. She thought I could use some of the cut off from the 24” rail and add it to the 30”.

She was disappointed, and I don’t think she believed me.

The Jolly Good Framer #1 wrote:A few years ago I rang up a customer to tell her that her framing order was ready, it was a very small frame, She asked me to remind her how much it was and I told her £18. Two months later she came in to collect it. I wrapped it up and she held out £80. I was a bit confused with this and told her that it was only £18!
A big look of relief came over her face as she had misheard me thinking I had said £80 and it had taken her 2 months to save up the money from her pension.
I’m gonna have to learn to speak more clearly on the phone.

Hahahaaaa. Nice one. I have had it work the other way. In my early days I remember doing a little picture for an old lady who was also a neighbour. It was a clipping from a magazine, about 5x4". I knocked up a quick frame in a small basic wood moulding, probably offcuts at that. Scrap of glass, no mount..... I charged her £3.50. She look ed at me totally gobsmacked. "Oh. I didn't realise it was going to be that much". and "I didn't really want it quite so big". And then she launched into an incredible 'hard done by' performance. Tipping out her purse unto the counter and groaning as she slowly counted all her change one coin at a time. I was half tempted to say "Put your money away, it's on the management", but no. The price was virtually a token charge. It aught to have been about £15, but I thought, "Bollocks! Here I am trying to give a neighbour a break and she is trying her best to guilt-trip me". It made me a bit angry if truth be told. Also taught me a valuable lesson.