QUESTIONS THAT WILL HAUNT YOU
Posted: Tue 10 Mar, 2009 9:53 pm
QUESTIONS THAT WILL HAUNT YOU
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If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway..
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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can you cry under water?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What disease did cured ham actually have?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway..
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
